see asterisk for more detail re: access, community, mutual support

more specifically:
OK. So. This is what happens when you support me: i support you. Deal? Deal*. Very exciting! You support me, i support you. That is what community is about folks. Right there.

Do you realize that if everyone said "No. No, we will neither attend nor support this inaccessible event because it shuts out members of our communities. How can we make this different together?", that if more people said that, stuff would change much quicker and more appropriately? And that then i could spend more time cuddling? Sounds good to me.

Support me and i will support you. Have each other's back. Deal? Deal.

some point form on stealth, queer, trans, gimp, far and privilege

just some thoughts for the day...

- being "stealth" is not / wont be the downfall of the trans community

- it is CISSEXISM that challenges us, that degrades us, that creates rifts, that kills us, so please dont attempt to derail us in our self-love, support, community building projects with some bullshit about how our troubles are because of stealth folks, genderqueers, trans kinksters, fat trans folks, or any other trans person.

- not all people you identify as being "stealth" trans people identify that way (either as stealth or trans or any combination), and THAT IS OK

- being cis(sexual and or gender) does not mean you are a bad person, and it is not an attack on your personal freedoms to be identified as cis(sexual or gender).

- not all trans folks, including myself, want to hear your neverending processing about your cissexual privilege

- some of us, including me, do want to hear what work youre doing

- queer =/= trans by default; trans =/= queer by default

- i personally believe that how i am queer is about who and how i fuck, about my political strategies, is also intimately connected to my trans identity, it's about a bunch of stuff, and THAT IS OK

- this fat person does not want to listen to you process your emotions around my body

- this gimp does not want to listen to you process your emotions around my body

- advocating for a scent-free and/or scent-reduced space is not restricting your personal freedoms, creating anarchy and/or creating a police state

- anyone, ANYONE, who tells me that they refuse to place accessibility information on their websites and other promotional materials is actively accessing ENabled privilege. Full stop.

- it is not my job as a gimp to educate you about my thoughts on gimp stuff, but it is most certainly my right to do so, and it would do us all a favourfor you to pay some attention

- my love of my fat body, my trans body, my gimped body, is not some delusion. It is self love in the face of a never-ending flood of messages that my body is wrong, is other, is worthless, is ugly.

Do not get in the way of me loving my body.

My Tranifesto: An Ongoing Self Exam Sans Stirrups

i started this in April, but have been adding to it.

Always more to think about and add...

My Tranifesto: An Ongoing Self Exam Sans Stirrups

1a. i am in love with my cunt. My cunt is the sacred black hole into which all the things that try to assail my heart are turned, spun, chrysalis. My cunt has always been with me, and always will, whether in its current solid form or in brainwaves or memories. My cunt is like none other. My cunt is mine and mine alone. My cunt is powerful, beautiful, unstoppable, and neither rape, nor guilt, nor expectation, nor the state can take that away. i will maintain and celebrate this connection, without shame, without fear, without explanation. i will include in my life only those people who respect this. My cunt-love doesn't take away or minimize you or your identity, your cunt or not-cunt. My cunt-love doesn't have anything to do with you. My cunt-love is between me and my cunt, spun from the silk of my Mother's cunt, and her Mother's cunt, and so on.

1 b. i refuse to use my cunt as a tool of and/or justification for oppression. My cunt has too long been at the shit-end of that stick. My cunt is not a podium from behind which i will allow myself or others to spout hatred.

Specifically, in solidarity with Unconsentually Assigned Male At Birth trans folks:

• i will not allow myself or others to use my cunt as a tool to oppress UAMAB trans folks.

• i will not allow the existence or not-existence of an UAMAB trans persyn's cunt to determine whether and to what extent i show her/them respect, solidarity and compassion.

• i will not demand that UAMAB trans folks' interpretations, experiences or physical embodiments of their cunts match my own. My solidarity will not be based on her/their ability or willingness to conform to mine.

• i will consistently challenge myself on my assumptions around what it means to me to have been born with a particular kind of cunt, and
  

• i will not allow those who would use their cunt against UAMAB trans folks to sway me in this exploration.

• i will call out those who use the existence or not-existence of a specific kind of cunt to defend their hatred, fear, exclusion, marginalization and oppression of UAMAB trans folks; and refuse to participate in any way in undertakings based in such oppression.

• i refuse, despite the ongoing invitations, to enjoy "women-only" events; and will scrutinize "women-focused", "women and trans" or "past, present and future women" events until such time it's clear these events and spaces truly honour all women.

2. i am proud of who and what i am. i am Trans. i have been and am fucking raging. i am tired of bullshit that tries to degrade me, to insult me, to minimize and/or trivialize my pain, to erase and appropriate my history. i will not allow myself to succumb to this violence, this soul-murder. and i won't allow non-Trans people, any of them, to take that and turn it into some Queer Theory bullshit, or into some psychosis, or some thing i'm meant to be ashamed of and / or open up to every fucker who wants a piece.

3. i am proud of my community and will support and protect and struggle alongside my Trans friends, lovers, comrades, acquaintances, strangers, in their own searches and struggles to be proud of their communities. i will challenge myself, expand my brain, my heart, the grasp of my fingers, shut the fuck up, speak out, then shut the fuck up and speak up and shut the fuck up and so on so that i can be a solid member of my Trans communities.

4. i have a right to be in this body, and to use the language i choose to define it. i will consistently challenge myself around the words i choose, i will continue to learn, to listen, to adapt, to honour.

5. i will not allow myself to succumb to the sexist and transphobic bullshit i'm forced to swim in every day. i will call bullshit. every. fucking. time. And because there are times my spirit is broken, or my head is in a fog or my body pain is too much to bear, i will take care of that, and then i'll get back to calling bullshit.

6. i will continue to not poison my Trans body with alcohol, whether attempting to numb the physical and emotional pain in my body, my family, or the universe. i want my cunt to continue to experience life free from numbness. i came out of my Mother's cunt in a bath of numbness, and stayed there for thirty years. i'm done. This isn't easy, it's not without setbacks, challenges, questions, context. But silence & denial = death, and yeah, i'm done with that too.

ally is a verb not an identity

Hi folks,
a semi-annual request.

If you are going to advertise for events, gatherings, etc, please for the love of golden-fried perogies,
INCLUDE THE MAUDEDAMN
ACCESS INFO!

It takes a phone call or a visit to the space, a moment to type it up along with the rest of your post, and does a world of good.
Some incredibly basic examples of what im personally asking for:
- is the entire space "wheelchair accessible"? Do you know what that means?

- if just the main space is w/c accessible, give some detail about what the deal is with the bathrooms: can a person in a wheelchair access them? can that person transfer on either or only one side of the toilet? are there bars? does the door swing into or out of the stall? what are the measurements?

- if there are stairs, how many? are there landings? are there railings? on one or both sides? how wide is the staircase?

- is there to be a clear path so folks can get through the space without getting knocked on their asses or run into?

- is the space scent and smoke free?

- is the space on an accessible bus route? if not, is it on any bus route?

- is there sign language interpretation available?

- is the place well-lit or moody? are signs big and bold, high contrast?

- is there gimp parking available?

- is there a variety of seating? or is it all those folding "chairs" of doom?

- is there a contact person for access issues?
- etc

It seems like a lot of work, but really, its not. It's considerably more work to show up at an event only to find it's up a huge flight of stairs, and/or the bathroom isnt accessible, and/or the place smells like a perfume shop.

There are those of us who have been working on this kind of stuff for a long ass time and already know the info you need. If youre unsure, ask.

But please, get on it. Toute suite.

Thanks, loves.
xoxox